October 19, 2010
September 10, 2010
You are my answer
In your presence, Lord, there is joy.
Am I missing your glory when I focus
on my pain? I am weak. You are great.
Have I forgotten what is truly important?
Why do I not feel the joy that once proved
so precious to me? If you can be glorified
in my weakness, will I be content with it? If
you become bigger through my pain, will
I give you thanks? Can I live in gratitude
despite my exhaustion? Or frustration?
Or confusion? When it's a sacrifice, will
I still praise you? How long, Lord, can I
go on like this waiting for your voice? Help
me to listen. Help me to see it. Help me
not to focus on a conclusion as my answer,
help me to focus on You. For you are my
answer. You are my hope. In your presence,
I find joy. You drew me out of my pit. If
you've done that, why do I doubt? Why does
my heart cry out in anguish and fear? You've
proven Your faithfulness time and time again.
Why is my soul downcast yet again? I look to
you! My feet are on you, my Rock. My ways
are secure. Though hidden in darkness for now.
I will rest. I will hope. I will have joy.
September 4, 2010
Testing of the Righteous
All events are under control of Providence;
consequently all the trials of our outward
life are traceable at once to the great First
Cause. All providences are doors to trial.
Even our mercies, like roses, have their
thorns. Men may be drowned in seas of
prosperity as well as in rivers of affliction.
Our mountains are not too high, and our
valleys are not too low for temptations:
trials lurk on all roads. Everywhere, above
and beneath, we are beset and surrounded
with dangers. Yet no shower falls unper-
mitted from the threatening cloud; every
drop has its order before it hastens to the
earth. The trials which come from God are
sent to prove and strengthen our graces,
and so at once to illustrate the power of
divine grace, to test the genuineness of
our virtues, and to add to their energy.
Our Lord is His infinte wisdo and super-
abundent love sets so high a value upon
His people's faith that He will not screen
them from those trials by which faith is
strengthened. You would never have poss-
essed the precious faith which now supports
you if the trial of your faith had not been
like fire. You are a tree that never would
rooted so well if the wind had not rocked
you to and fro, and made you take firm hold
upon the precious truths of the covenant
grace. Wordly ease is a great foe to faith; it
loosens the joints of holy valor, and snaps
the sinews of sacred courage. The balloon
never rises until the cords are cut; affliction
is the scissors to believing souls. While the
wheat sleeps comfortably in the husk it is
useless to humanity. It must be threshed
out of its resting place before its value can
be known. Thus it is good that Jehovah
tests the righteous, for it allows them to
grow rich towards God."
- Charles Spurgeon
May 1, 2010
Esther Ahn Kim
During WWII, and the Japanese occupation of Korea, that Esther's journey of faith really began. She refused to bow down at the shrines set up in every corner of her country and was eventually imprisoned for six years, from 1939 until 1945.
Knowing she was destined for prison for refusing to bow to idols, Esther spent time training herself both physically and spiritually. Each day she would find and eat food that was decaying, knowing that was what she would be served in prison. The discipline she demonstrated is humbling; how many of us would choose to eat rotten foods?
While preparing for prison, she memorized more than one hundred chapters of the Bible and many hymns because she knew she would not be allowed to keep her Bible. She spent countless hours seeking God through fasting and praying. These times when she read Scriptures led to greater clarity, and she was able to surrender her fear of being tortured.
Reading her story left me wanting more. More intimacy with Christ. More love for people. More of God in my life. And to be honest, more disiplined. She was a well-disciplined believer, but there was nothing self-righteous about her. Her obedience to Christ only increased her ability to hear the voice of the Spirit, and consequently filled her with overwhelming love for the people she came in contact with.
When she eventually was taken to prisonn, God used her in countless ways. One night a young Chinese woman convicted of killing her husband was brought in. She moaned incessantly and beat on the doors until the guards tied her hands behind her back. It was this woman that God called Esther to love and to reach out to. Esther held the woman's feet at night to warm them, even though the woman was covered in her own excrement. Though food rations were small, Esther gave up her portions for three days to this woman.
Over time, the Chinese woman began to respond, carrying on conversation and eventually accepting the good news of the gospel. The woman was later executed for her crime, but she went to her death alive in Christ.
This is one of many people God used Esther to minister to. Murderers and swindlers who were utter outcasts were changed before all who watched as the love of Christ, through Esther, healed their hearts and gave them hope. Even the jailers and government officials noticed how Esther shone in that dark place.
She could have just endured her suffering like a good Christian, and we would have applauded her for it.
But she was not content to merely endure.
She was ready every day and every moment, asking god, "Who do YOU want me to love for You today?"
April 29, 2010
More to Come..
I'm learning A LOT.
[more to come.]
"Nothing matters except our King and God. Don't let yourself forget. Soak it in and keep remembering that it is true. He is everything." - Francis Chan
